when all else fails...

Turn to your one true passion. You might not think you have one, but you do. Everyone does. Whether you are born with it engraved in your soul or if you engrave it there yourself, you have one. It could be a sport, or just talking on the phone... it could be sleeping. Because all that matters is that you can enjoy it. You don't need to be good at it. It doesn't need to be something really difficult. It's something you can do no matter what, and when left to your own accord, you can completely unwind. It's something you can do no matter what mood you're in, or what physical state you are in. As long as you are conscious, there is some way you can enjoy what you enjoy.

My one true passion is dancing. I know that a lot of girls that say this, and some don't really mean it. But I know that I mean it. Dance class may be strenuous, practice may be boring, but when I dance for myself, I always feel better. And if I'm unable or just too tired to dance, I listen to the music. I listen to the music and put my mind through what I would feel if I were dancing... and I feel better.

I'm not claiming that my word is the almighty truth. But I do believe that everyone has a passion. And if I'm wrong... then I feel very bad for whoever doesn't. Because nothing has saved me more this week than dance, and my music. Now I fully understand what everyone means when they say freshman year is a big transition. I guess I didn't quite understand how different life would be without seeing my friends at school every day. I didn't understand how many new things you go through. But now I get it. I miss my friends. I miss my middle school life. I miss knowing everyone in my grade. I love meeting new people, but I miss the familiarity. And I definitely miss having free time. If I lose touch with any of you throughout the course of my first semester in high school, just know that I'm sorry, and I still love you. I never imagined I'd be so busy-- I never knew how fast time could pass when there is so little of it to waste. So now I impose my blog theme into my life... I will seize the moment. I will live life to it's fullest.

A reflective day for me~ 9.11 ~Always remember the innocents who lost their lives.

i'm not the only stalker

My friend was telling a story about last year's homecoming... when she introduced her friend to her date, her friend said, "Wow, so YOU'RE the infamous one!! I know all about you! First period, study, second period..." heh that's HILARIOUS especially because um I know almost the entire schedule of some people... d-wightful people.. HAHAHAHAHA That was Elyse's idea, not mine!!! I don't come up with stupid puns with their names!! Anyway.. I'm not the stalker, Emily is. And you all know it's true! rofl. Yeah, whatever... I'm nada freshie stalker... hehe =)

Things are kind of turning up... or maybe it's just my current mood. For some reason my current mood has such a direct effect on my perception. It's kind of disturbing, because then I never know what's true. Reality is skewed, I say, SKEWED!!! Anyway... I'm finding where my friends go during passing periods so sometimes we can walk to classes together... which is really only 5 minutes, but it's better than nothing!! I've developed great skill with opening lockers, and lunch actually counts for the rest of the day. Except before Hawkettes, because I always have to eat before practice. Ummm Hawkettes is getting better too, I guess... I think I'm going kind of unnoticed though. To be honest, I think I'm doing pretty well. Oh well.

Still got the homecoming problem.. heh, yeah, 'cause I totally could have suddenly gotten rid of it in a day. Sigh. But life is alright. For now.

i need a break, period.

sOh tired =( One game down, but homecoming prep now. Tomorrow, the rest of the halftime dance we have to do with Varsity. Thursday, marching choreography for the parade. Friday, marching with Varsity. Next week, possibly practice every day. Still need to learn our halftime. etc etc. So tiring... no break... no end in sight. Sept 20, homecoming... to date, or not to date? haha.. as if I have a choice. Depends who, if anyone, asks me. Getting nervous about all the girls on the team n what the heck they do for the practice before homecoming, cuz I'm pretty sure they're doing something... hmm... do I need a date? What a question. It totally conflicts with my whole "Why depend on a guy?" dealy, though it totally exposes my inability to bear embarassment... rawrr. Did anyone understand what I just said? haha... IM me if you really wanna hear about it. Stupid dilemma. =(

Can't speak in complete sentences.. totally braindead.. still gotta read stupid mythology book for English, even though I read it already in 4th grade even though I have the book but I had to buy it again because the page numbers are different... =( And today... I heard some bad news that I knew I'd hear since 2 months ago... strangely enough, it hasn't upsetted me much. Is it because it doesn't matter to me, or am I just too dead to care anymore? Life is .. gray.

i need a break from negativity...

remember the happy list? hehe

:: music :: dance :: waves :: green :: vanilla :: fluffy clouds :: fluffy towels :: sunrises :: italy :: hot chocolate :: almond :: pretty eyes :: citrus :: dolphins :: roses :: wind :: windows :: homestar! :: friends :: popsicles :: phone calls :: cookies :: cooking :: sunshine :: mint :: fountains: sleep :: sleep :: sleep ::... -_-

:: pure sincerity :: unnecessary compliments :: thoughtful criticism :: provocative conversations :: pointless conversations :: phone conversations at 4 am :: time with your best friends :: "jus chillin" :: watching the stars :: slight breezes :: first snow :: letting loose :: going crazy :: dancing while everyone looks at you funny :: flopping onto your bed :: laughing at an inside joke :: laughing for no apparent reason :: making up a stupid joke and pretending it's funny :: accomplishing a goal :: meeting someone with the same interests as you :: songs that seem like they were written for you :: songs that you can put on repeat forever :: the glow of stagelights :: blasting music in an empty house :: cartwheels :: cartwheels down the aisles of grocery stores :: grocery shopping at 12 am or later :: dew on grass :: lying on the ground :: sitting in the middle of a street :: being told i made someone's day :: telling someone they made my day :: smiles from strangers :: conversations with strangers :: becoming great friends with a former stranger :: stretching :: feeling exhausted after accomplishing something :: accomplishing something no one thought you could ::

Oh, and one concluding happy thought: I'm getting my braces off sometime this school year. =D